Mr. Hands

     I woke up strapped to a table unable to move. Just a minute ago I was trotting through a luscious green field just enjoying the freedom I had, then all of a sudden I had blacked out and now I was awake. I looked at my surroundings but the room was pitch black and I was unable to move because I was strapped down tight. Minutes went by then hours then when I surely thought I was going to die from starvation, I saw a light coming from the other end of the room. The door creaked open and a big man that kinda looked like Mr. Chiquitillo Jalapeno Junior walked inside, then when he got close enough that I could actually see his face, I noticed that it wasn’t Mr. Chiquitillo Jalapeno Junior because that man had a pedostach. He looked at me with a devilish grin on his face and slowly took out something huge from his fanny pack that he was wearing. I couldn’t quite make out what the large item was. Then he took it out of his case and I noticed that it was a needle. This man was going to inject me with steroids. He explained to me what his plan was as he inserted the huge needle into my butt. As the needle penetrated my skin I made a loud neigh. He said that he was going to inject a lot of steroids into me and put me in horse races to win him money. That really didn’t bother me I had always wanted to be a famous race horse. After he was done giving me about fifty shots of steroids he let me run free. So now I’m scratching my butt on the fence because that shot that he gave me really irritated it.

McFish

     The water was calm and the weather was perfect for a fishing trip today. Gracie and her pa were going out to their little lake that they have in their backyard. The reason that they were fishing is because there wasn’t any food in the fridge and pa was too lazy to drive to the store so they decided to try and catch a fish. As they arrived at the fishing spot pa said “Let me show you how it’s done Gracie.” He then cast the fishing rod into the huge lake, he sat near the edge of the water and explained to Gracie how to fish and the importance of patience when you’re fishing. They sat still and a few minutes past but still nothing, pa was about to reel it back in but then he felt something pulling on the fishing line. He then started to reel it in really quick but he had caught a big one and the fish was putting up a good fight. Pa stood up to get more strength but as soon as he stood up the fish pulled him into the lake and he schlagered on the bottom of the lake. Gracie just busted out laughing like a dying dog for two straight minutes till Pa said “quit laughing you little kid! This was a bad idea lets just go get a mcgangbang at McDonalds.” Gracie agreed and they left immediately.

vocab
Schlagered-The act of falling face first then hands second

Spidey Senses

Sight: The sight of a alluring double rainbow all the way across the sky.
Touch: The soothing touch of water as your swimming.
Sound: The phenomenal sound of a car with a beast exhaust system.
Taste: The luscious taste of a cheesecake.
Smell: The smell of mouthwatering pancakes and bacon strips in the morning.